


Magma Isn't Purple, But It's Beautiful

by tuesday



Category: Dwarf Fortress
Genre: Canon-Typical Behavior, Canon-Typical Violence, Dwarves, Gen, Magma, Referenced Baby Death, Rocks Fall Everyone Dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 00:03:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20461730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tuesday/pseuds/tuesday
Summary: Subtitle: All Problems Can Be Solved with Sufficient Quantities of Molten Rock (and Five Problems that Are)





	Magma Isn't Purple, But It's Beautiful

**Author's Note:**

  * For [draconicsockpuppet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/draconicsockpuppet/gifts).

> I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for requesting this. I have used a number of your tags and also your title. This was a lot of fun!

1\. Alcohol Shortages

The fact was, there were too many dwarves. Tekkud saw that now. The farms were on the higher levels. The legendary artifacts were locked up tight in the treasury behind obsidian doors and raised bridges. Everything else could be replaced. Tekkud went to the warm walls of the stairwell. He dug. And dug. And dug. He knew behind this final layer of rock, the fiery earth's blood that powered their workshops waited. The volcano cared not for dwarven troubles. It would continue on whether they all died to riots or abandoned the fortress altogether.

Hefting his -copper pick-, Tekkud dug on.

Magma solved everything.

* * *

2\. Beauracracy

The elven diplomat wouldn't go away. The paperwork piled up. No matter what Likkot did, her desk never cleared. Even when she went to eat her cave crocodile biscuits while drinking her strawberry wine in the legendary dining room, Lafo followed, wanting to discuss trees.

That was fine. Dwarves could be recalled to areas of safety. A channel could be opened. Magma could roam free.

Likkot, bookkeeper and negotiator, beckoned Lafo closer. She put her hand on the lever. She knew her sacrifice would be remembered.

* * *

3\. Goblinite Haulers Devoured By Rampaging Herd of Zombie Deer

"Why did we settle here?" Astesh asked. "We knew the miasma could raise the dead."

"Because it was the only volcano in reach," Lokum answered.

Astesh sighed. "All those goblin daggers, wasted."

"Not to mention the toll in dwarven lives," Lokum said.

Astesh and Lokum watched on from the safety of an upper story window carved into the volcano's side as the the lava flowed forth, consuming everything in its path. The goblins, the cheaply forged metal gear they'd brought with them, and the bodies of the fisherdwarves sent to retrieve it all went up in flames soon overtaken by molten rock. So, too, went the zombie deer.

"It was worth it," Lokum said.

"Oh, definitely," Astesh agreed.

In the east, more pink miasma rose and crept forward. To the south and west, fires raged. Everything directly in front of them was covered in the bright glow of lava. What little ground was untouched was coated in red from the recent blood rain.

It was beautiful.

* * *

4\. Dwarven Nobility Fried In Lava

"And what's the chute above me?" the duke asked.

"That's for letting in your personal lava fall," Rakust answered cheerfully.

"And what about the channel to let it out?" the duke asked.

"Oh, we don't have one of those yet," Rakust said.

The duke nodded. "Very good, very good. Get right on that. As soon as you've gotten me a bed that isn't made of mushroom cap. Gold will do. Decorate it with quartz and pictures of cobras. I like their clever little faces."

"Enjoy your new tomb," Rakust said, cheer not in the least bit diminished. She knew what came next.

"You mean room," the duke said.

"I know what I said." Rakust sealed the obsidian door behind her. Elsewhere, someone else pulled a lever. The door and walls grew warm.

Humming to herself, Rakust walked away. For some reason, dukes kept moving in. As long as they did, Gravemachine would accommodate them.

* * *

5\. Pull Lever To Kill Everyone

"Don't do anything hasty," Rakust said.

"You can still come back from this," Astesh said.

"You should never have let me take my baby into battle," Lokum said.

They were in the main lever room. Lokum had her hand on _the_ lever, the one linked to the chute at the top of the fortress.

"You'll kill us all," Rakust said.

"That's the idea." Lokum pulled the lever.

The volcano cared not for dwarven troubles. It cared not for their wails and pleas and despair. It was merciless in its application of gravity and fluid dynamics. The dwarves were a problem and had made it the solution.

As it had done before, as it was always willing to do, the volcano applied magma to it.

It worked pretty well.


End file.
